UVSC...What It's Meant to Me

My cute husband Marcus and I had one of those "life" discussions last night before he went to work. We were reflecting on our experience here the last 3 1/2 years, how we feel now that it's coming to an end, and what we want in the next stage of our lives. He wrote a blog post about some of what we talked about (you can read it by visiting www.marcusjpoole.blogspot.com) and challenged me to do the same. So...here it is:

Basically I told Marcus last night that even though I worked very hard the last couple of years at UVSC and graduated with a Behavioral Science degree I feel very incomplete because I do not have a Bachelor's in Social Work (which is the degree I spent the first three years of college working towards...UVSC just didn't offer it and it wasn't feasible for us to move so I could finish).

Anyway, those of you who know me well may know that I have a strong desire to have a meaningful career as a Social Worker at some point in my life. I know there are several related jobs I could hold with the education and experience I have now, but none of them are really what I want to do...just a bunch of jobs I could do but would really rather not (I don't like working unless I love what I'm doing).

So last night I found myself feeling very incomplete with my education and feeling like I'm having a hard time putting it to rest as we move on to the next part of our life.

Before I go on let me explain what I REALLY want out of life for myself in our next stage. I want to be a 100% stay at home mother who LOVES it more than anything else she could possibly be doing. I will only have these two little boys once and I really want to indulge myself in that role with them and not worry about classes, work, or anything else that might be a distraction. I have spent Connor's entire life like that already and I want to be done for now.

I know it will be a challenge for me to become that kind of mother (you know, the one who cries when summer break is over because she has enjoyed having her kids at home with her all day every day so much...Sister Hinckley once said she felt that way and it made me jealous...I want that tender quality). Anyway, I know it will take time, effort, and the Lord's help for me to develop those qualities but I know there is nothing more important for me to be working on at this point in my life.

My problem lies in the fact that I have been having a hard time putting to rest my desire to complete my BSW...the thought of not being done haunts me. I told Marcus last night that I just want to be settled in my mind with what I have done so far and be able to move on in my life and return to schooling when the time is right again. I do not want to be constantly thinking about education and career when I'm trying to become the mother that I really want to be...and becoming that mother REALLY is what I want to be doing right now, NOT school and work.

That's how I was feeling last night.

BUT THEN Marcus said something to me that really put my mind to rest. He said, "You did everything you could have done at UVSC to become closer to getting your BSW". This is true! I had never thought of that before. There were several general classes that I needed to finish before I could graduate from any school I had attended previously but kept putting them off because they were not as enjoyable to take as Social Work classes were. Now they are complete! When I do go back to school all I will have to do is finish a few Social Work classes and complete my licensure practicum...things UVSC did not offer. That's not so bad!

I may not be a licensed Social Worker yet but so what? I am not wanting to use that license right now anyway. My time at UVSC was not wasted because it definitely moved me closer to my dream and it gave Marcus and I the experience of going to school together, and that experience really is priceless to us. We learned how to support one another, to sacrifice together, and to work hard as a team. Going to school at the same time has definitely helped us strengthen our marriage and grow closer as a couple.

I hope the work we've done in school and will do in school will really impact Connor and James in the future. I think that as they watch their father go to medical school and eventually become a Doctor that they will see for themselves that dreams can come true if you're willing to do the work it takes...and spend the time it takes. I hope they will never question their own potential or ability to become who they want to become.

So, Marcus, this is what I've learned the last couple years at UVSC:
-Three years go by quickly!
-Education (formal or informal) matters...a lot.
-Getting what you really want REALLY does take A LOT of hard work, time, and sacrifice, but there's no other way to do it.
-When you want something enough you'll find a way to make it happen.
-I can do and enjoy things I never thought I could (aka LOVING my Statistics and Advanced Writing classes and earning good grades in both).
-It's never too late to go after your dreams.
-AND not being 100% done yet does not mean the education I have so far is worthless...it's not.